I was pawing through stuff at the Smith’s Falls flea market Sunday when I came across a copy of the Toronto tabloid Hush. Published in the 1950s and early 1960s, Hush was a scandal sheet in every sense of the word.

It sent reporters to what was then called “Morality Court” to hear the cases of hookers and men charged under the still-on-the-books sodomy charges. And it covered petty scams, happenings at nudist colonies, and gave racetrack odds. There were a few pages of ads for hookers unconvincingly disguised as “lonely hearts” messages.

I read every word of this 1960 paper, marveling at the sorrowful stories offered up by its skilled wordsmiths. No political spin in this stuff, just a lot of tragedy, plenty of seedy sex, some wide-eyed enthusiasm for a nudist colony beauty contest, and stern condemnation of a two-bit crook who fleeced a young woman out of $100.

I miss that kind of news. Here, on the Hill, reporters are grinding out “Whither Quebec” eye-splitters, covering the floor crossing of an NDP MP who might as well have been in the witness protection program, or pontificating on themes like “Stephen Harper, Friend or Fiend?”

Not me. Can’t do it. I am no political Rumpelstiltskin, able to turn stale political straw into punditry gold. Instead, here’s some news you can use around the water cooler or during those embarrassing pauses at dinner:

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In which contributing editor Mark Bourrie looks at how a classic YouTube moment has shaped the way we will remember the ‘Occupy’ movement.

The “Occupy _____” movement has run its course, at least in Canada.

It was never very effective here. Protesters in Toronto were too polite or too weak to try to occupy Bay Street. Instead, they settled in a park co-owned by the Anglican Church and the City of Toronto. The church supported their protest, as did a large bloc of city councillors. Here in Ottawa, demonstrators politely took over a park, rather than risk the wrath of the riot squads by camping on Parliament Hill. They kept to the margins of Confederation Park, kept it clean, and even looked after the homeless people who normally live there.

In the end, though, Toronto’s city administration got a court ruling telling the occupiers to sleep elsewhere. The St. James Park protesters have put up token resistance, but most of them started packing Tuesday, as did the vast majority of the Occupy Ottawa crowd in Confederation Park.

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In which contributing editor Mark Bourrie suggests we look to the past to figure our way out of the European (and North American) financial crisis.

The other day, Barack Obama’s White House came out with the admission that, as far as anyone knows for sure, there’s no life on other planets. We’re stuck here with each other, which isn’t such a good thing when we owe each other so much money.

The aliens were our last hope for a bail-out.

Tuesday, word came that the minister of finance, Jim Flaherty, can’t add. That should not be news. In the 2006 election campaign, Flaherty said he’d never run a deficit. In the 2008 campaign, he said we weren’t at risk of a recession. In last spring’s campaign, the Tories promised to balance the books by 2014. Flaherty’s admitting now that he can’t tame the deficit any time soon, no matter how many savings his $90,000-a-day efficiency experts think they can find in this town. Anyone who thinks Flaherty can ever balance the books should mull these two words — “Michael Wilson”.

In the past few weeks, Flaherty and Stephen Harper have mugged to the cameras, chastising the spendthrift Europeans for their wasteful ways. It’s been a big hit with the nodding monkeys in Canada’s financial press, who conveniently ignore the fact that we’re broke, too. The total of federal, provincial, and municipal debt, along with Canada Mortgage and Housing’s mortgage guarantees, plus many obligations like pensions and health care, should be enough to shut their mouths, but you can’t shame the shameless.

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In which contributing editor Mark Bourrie takes a historical look at how various Canadian governments have alternately embraced — or forbidden — Canada’s most lucrative “vices”

As I write this column, I’m sitting on a couch in the nude, waiting for Jerry Springer to come on. That might seem immoral to some. Or even an attack on everything resembling human dignity. Depends, I suppose, if you’ve ever seen me in the flesh.

But there’s so many more reasons to be scandalized. I was driving down the road the other day and was rather shocked to hear an ad by the Liquor Control Board of Ontario pushing whisky. Yes, folks, move up to whisky. It opens so many doors for you.

Soon, the LCBO will start its Christmas blitz, reminding us to salt away lots of hard liquor for the holiday season. For several reasons, most going back to childhood, the association of Christmas holidays and lots of booze gives me the chills. I bet the folks who work at shelters for abused women and pick the human carnage off the roads shudder, too.

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Contributing editor Mark Bourrie ponders the timing of the Occupy Ottawa protest and deduces that we’re not quite ready for revolution — yet

“This is a process-driven approach,” a facilitator told the crowd early in the day. “No outcome is guaranteed.”
— Ottawa Citizen reporter Tom Spears’ report on the kick-off of Occupy Ottawa

Questioning the point of the protest. Photography by Mark Bourrie

You betcha. At least on the first part. On the second part, I’m willing to take some bets.

A process-driven revolutionary political movement. They do resonate through history. Who can forget Martin Luther King’s great “I have an item on the agenda for which I seek consensus” speech? “I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and seek consensus on the following item discussed earlier at the plenary session: ‘We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal and, unless 10 percent or more object, we have a consensus on the three earlier motions to defer.’”

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With just a couple of days left to go before the Ontario election, contributing editor Mark Bourrie checks out a new biography of William Lyon Mackenzie King — and ponders what character traits are needed to become a leader.

Allan Levine, a Winnipeg writer, has a new book out on that great freak of a prime minister, William Lyon Mackenzie King.

I’m a member of a very small group of historians who believes King was far more of a genius than he was a nut. In fact, my own reading — not a crystal ball one  — is that King was an absolutely superb politician with a perfect sense of timing. He was a natural mediator, and you can’t understand King unless you look very carefully at his years working in the United States for the Rockefellers, settling their strikes and salvaging their lousy reputation.

I’ve written a paper on this mysterious time of his life. I hoped to explain to people how he developed the ability to play the media like a flute. (For the insomniacs among you, click here to read.)

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Contributing editor Mark Bourrie weighs the ethics of the ethical oil boosters — and the power of the Saudis.

Ethical oil. It kinda makes sense.

Get North America off the oil pumped by ugly regimes like Saudi Arabia and the emirates of Kuwait.  Stop paying gobs of money to Hugo Chavez’ commie regime in Venezuela, the kleptocrats in Nigeria, and various other scum and vermin around the world.

Scraping more oil out of “unconventional” sources in North America doesn’t solve the energy crisis or reduce pollution. Only a serious attempt to cut demand will do that. The most obvious solution is to re-design the car, ditching its century-old technology of a cast-iron internal combustion engine and a sheet steel body for technology that’s more efficient, and materials that are lighter and stronger.

The cost of oil — the real cost in war, corruption, environmental degradation, human rights abuses, bad foreign policy decisions, taxpayer-funded infrastructure — has always been far, far more than the dollars-per-barrel price.

But, until we fix the car, we’re stuck with oil wells, gasoline, petrodollars, and all the trouble that comes with them.

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